A Brief Synopsis of Everything That's Happened

Let me start off by congratulating my homey Merle for turning 23 years old! One of the homies that I can say that has helped me through some rough times. It was November 8th, 2007 and I was stoked because I did not have work that day. And guess what I ended up doing that day?

Well first, I attended class and picked up my exam. I didn't do so well because of my lack of studying plus me having short term memory and all. But I easily get distracted and tired from reading and writing over and over and over again. Anyways, I ended up leaving a couple of minutes early because I just could not take anymore from my professor. His lectures are as boring as school itself. And since I got off early, I called my friend/barber, David. So after class, I swooped through David's for a quick cut before Merle's Birthday.

And then, Jaina called me and told me that she wanted to get her tattoos. I was like, "Now? Are you serious?" So after I got done with my haircut, I went straight to Jaina's house to pick her up and take her to the parlor. I actually had a good time with her and at the tattoo parlor. Everyone there was straight chill and honestly, I felt like I worked there, walking around freely amongst the rooms. But I was so amazed on how good Jaina's tattoos were. She added two tattoos. The first one, cherry blossoms on her left lower back, and the second, a rosary around her left wrist. The art and detail are so amazing, that every time I see them, I just have to kiss them. I wanted to so much, but I had to control myself since we were just friends. How hard it was to hold back. But when she got her tattoos, I held her hands because I knew how much pain it was to get tattoos. And that's when I was thinking in my head, I miss this. I haven't done this is quite a long time, and it feels real good!

Anyways, after a long day of tattoos, about 5 hours to be exact, we decided to get some food. But it had to be quick because we were running late on Merle's surprise at the Miramar Speed Circuit. Jaina and I ordered the Teriyaki Burger combo. One of my favorites of the menu besides the Jalapeno burger. Jaina was a beast, she ate her food in a matter of 15 minutes. I was shocked!

Well, we ended up making it on time with time to spare before Sarah brought Merle to the Speed Circuit. To my surprise, it was only Jaina and I, along with Romin, David and his girl, Cherie to surprise Merle while everyone came late. It was sad. :( Well, we got to race and man, that was so fun. Even though I got 4th place in the actual race, it didn't really matter because it was a blast! Before the race, I had to drop Jaina off because she had an exam she had to study for, but I told her that she didn't need to because I would hook her up with a doctor's note to get excused. It was good that she didn't race anyways because if she did, she probably would've been in so much pain because of the bumping from Luke. I swear, my friend Luke is such a terrible, reckless driver. A cheater basically.

The Birthday Boy


Friends till the End


My Nephew Kayden


Me and my boy David


Rest of the Homies


After the race, we traveled Downtown to eat at "The Stripper's Club." And no, it's not what you think it is. It's an actual restaurant where you order your steak, and cook it yourself. It's a good experience, but the wait was just so long. We waited 30 minutes just for raw steaks, and it took another 15-20 minutes to cook. But it was pretty good. I didn't eat, but I got my drank on. Anyways, I was kinda bored because I honestly just wanted to go home and sleep, plus I wanted to talk to Jaina about the whole night, and tell her how much she missed out on.



On November 9th, 2007, I woke up and went over to Jaina's house at around 10:30 because I had promised her dad that I would mow his lawn because he had cut his foot moving a glass table, and a piece of glass had cut his foot. So he wanted to keep his foot sanitary. And crazy as it seems, I wanted to take Jaina out to the mall to do some shopping. So after I was done, I went home, changed, and headed back to her house to pick her up. She said that she needed long sleeves, and that she wanted to go to Forever 21 to get them. They have so much good clothes there for cheap, it makes me wonder why they can't have a shop for men similar to this without having other people make fun of you.

Before we actually went shopping, we decided to get a fix. A fix on some coffee to be exact. I ordered a Peppermint Mocha Frap and Jaina had order a White Chocolate Peppermint Mocha Frap. Both were iced, and my coffee was gollygoshdarnit good. Then we headed over to Forever 21 to get her long sleeves. We ended up getting more than just long sleeves, and ended up getting outfits. I told her to go ahead and try on whatever she wanted. So she did. And for the first time, I actually enjoyed it because I was spending some quality time with her. She tried on everything she and I had picked out and I critique what looked flattering, and what didn't. She decided that she would pick out the ones that she wanted, but I decided to get her all the clothes that she wanted. Sounds crazy doesn't it. I just took out my ex-girlfriend on a just missed out on $400 shopping spree.

To be honest with you, I owed it to her, for always being there when I needed her. And the nice and loving person that I am, I wanted to show her how crazy I was about her and how much I can show her that my main focus is her. But anyways, we decided to head over to the Apple store because my headphones, well, the left side of my headphones lost sound, so we had set up an appointment. After that, we past by Charlotte Russe, and she was looking in there. I asked her if she wanted to go in, and she refused nicely, but I took her in with me anyways. She ended up trying on two pairs of shoes since they had a sale going on, buy two get the second 50% off. To her surprise, I wanted to pay for them. So, clothes and shoes!

Then, we decided to stop through L&L's to eat, but ended up at Willy's Workshop instead. Jaina wanted to buy me something over there. I told her that I didn't want anything, and then she told me that she would buy me some shoes. I told her that I didn't want any, but I couldn't refuse. She had picked out a pair of vans chukkas for me that were dope! I want to get her those vans classics that were the same material. Those were dope too! Anyways, we decided not to eat L&L's and we were on our way back to the car. Jaina saw some clothes in a store at Fashion Sense and I decided to pull her in. We looked around the store and she came across a jacket and a red dress. I told her to try on both. The red dress was sexy, but it didn't have a flattering tight fit. And I liked the jacket because I thought it would be fitting on a cold night on the town. So I bought her the jacket and I seriously spent over $1000 on her. I'm crazy to be doing this, but I'm just crazy in love.

I dropped her off because I had work at 6PM-11PM. I worked my shift and headed over to Louie's house to pick up my ID from Angel who I let borrow because he doesn't have his ID. People say we look alike, so I go along with everyone that he's my twin. And now that he has his haircut, we get mistaken a lot more because his haircut is kinda similar to mine. Anyway, I told them that I was going Downtown to hit up the clubs. Originally, it was just going to be me, but Luke and Louie's brother, Limuel wanted to go. But only Limuel was down to go.

So we left and hit up the Gaslamp District, Downtown. It was popping as usual on a Friday night. First, we stopped at Aubergine's, but the club was wack...no one was there! Then we walked to Stingaree's. It was actually pretty nice in there, but the drinks were major expensive. Limuel spent $140 on himself alone. Anyways, I saw Jaina there, but she was too twisted to remember anything. I finally saw what this dude looks like, and seriously, I can kill this fool with one punch. But what's violence going to solve? Nothing! So I restricted myself from doing anything and Jaina's friends held me back from doing anything. Then, Jaina's friends wanted me to leave with them. So I did, and just talked to them.

I decided to call them and ask them if they wanted to eat somewhere. They did, so we met up at Roberto's off of Miramar Road. I had three rolled tacos and a flour tortilla, and I was being such a girl because I couldn't finish it. It was because my mouth was so dry! Well, we just ended up talking for a bit before heading out and home. I actually had a good time that night and Jaina was making some unnecessary actions that night.

November 10th, 2007, I received a call from Jaina at 6:30 in the morning. But I was so pissed at her, that I didn't even want to pick it up. So I didn't and went back to sleep. And then Kylene, Jaina's friend, called me at around 7:30AM asking me if I've seen Jaina because Jaina's dad had called a left a message for Kylene asking if she had seen Jaina. And then Jaina's dad calls me a couple minutes after I get off the phone with Kylene. It was crazy!! I knew where she was at, so I decided to go there and find her. I was really worried about her. Her phone was off so there was no way of contacting her.

After finding nothing, I came back home and stopped through Kylene's work, the same place Jaina works at. I decided to talk to Kylene and calm her down because she was stressing the whole day, and especially since she's only had 2 hours of sleep. She's crazy for doing that, and doing that for a friend. Well, I decided to go home and just wait for anything from Jaina. And then, as soon as I got home, I got a call from this number. So I picked up, and to my amazement, it was Jaina. She had told me that she was ok, but I was pretty pissed at her because of how she made everyone worry so much about her. But I calmed down, and just told her that everyone was really worried about her.

Anyways, I called Jaina's dad and told him that she was okay. Then I called Kylene at her work to tell her that everything was alright so she wouldn't have to stress anymore. Then, a half an hour passed, and she calls me with her phone. She wants to come over and use my restroom. I don't want to be rude by telling her no, so I agree to let her use it. I even made some green tea for her hang over that she had from the previous night. Anyways, I just told her to rest until she feels comfortable going home. Then she started talking about how she didn't remember doing this and that. And how she feels bad about what she did in front of me. Honestly, I was pissed, and I let her know that. I couldn't forgive her for what she did. And then we just talked, and I was just hugging and comforting her, and then we started to talk about us. Then I just started to kiss her, and to my astonishment, she was actually making an effort to kiss back.

At around 12:30PM, I told her that it was time to go home. But she didn't want to go alone and asked me if I could go with her. And being the person that I am, I agree to go because I want to be there to for her. After getting out of the car, I was holding her hand approaching to the door of her house where Jaina's dad was waiting for her. Before we walked through, I gave her a kiss to show her that I'll be here. They we walked in, and Jaina's dad was pretty darn angry at her and gave her a lecture that she needed. I was going to leave for work again at 2PM-11PM, but I called in work and told Wayne that I would be late for work. Jaina didn't want me to leave because she had to talk with her mom as soon as she came home. But later, Jaina didn't want me to leave at all, so I decided to not go to work at all.

We just ended up talking, and Jaina had mentioned that she was going to call it quits with the other dude, and just end it as friends. Honestly, that was the best thing I ever heard from her because he was actually a jerk that just wanted to get some. We talked a little bit more, then we lied beside one another and I decided to make a move and kiss her passionately. I just wanted to prove to her that I can be Mr. Romantic. That I'm the one, the one that's been in front of her face the whole entire time. I guess you can say that we're trying to work things out, but I'm just going with the flow. Nothing official, just talking and seeing what comes out of it. I ended up sleeping with her till 2AM and decided to call it a night because I had work on Sunday, November 11.

Work was alright, as everything went casually and smoothly. Drama Free! It was great, just being care and stress free. And then I ended up staying at my abode and watching some television and doing some deep thinking. And now, it's time for me to rest.

Good Morning/Night to everyone!

And Happy Veterans Day!

Music is a Big Influence

It's amazing how much music makes the world go round. I mean, there's so much music in the world that I haven't heard yet, but the more and more you listen to the diversity of music, you get deeper into the beats, the singer/lyricist, the lyrics itself. I love music, and I don't know where I would be without it. When everything goes bad, I can also fall back on music to help me through anything. Music is an influence of everything, culture, religion, school, sleeping, walking, etc. But at the end of the day, I'll always fall back on hip-hop.

I leave you with a video. New 2Pac song.

A New Chapter of Life

My sobbing and secluding myself from everyone has gotten me no where in life. And that's why, I'm moving on. I am currently a bachelor again, and I'm not proud of it. I love Jaina a lot, but all I can do is just give her the spacethat she needs. I have been doing too much right now, and I'm realizing this. I'm only pushing her further and further away from me. It's just as of right now, we're not feeling that same connection. I wish I could make it up to her, and I'm slowly doing this.

I'm really glad that we ended up on good terms because I can talk to her about anything. She has always been a best friend and someone that has always been there for me for these past couple of years together. And I'll be returning the favor. I love her to death, and even if we end up as being just friends is better than not having her in my life at all. Will this story end up happy ever after? Only time will tell the future of this outcome.

But as I got home from work, I had to tell my mom the news about Jaina and I's recent split. It was tear dropping for me. As much as I had to say it, I didn't want to because I wanted to hold on to her so much. But after talking with her, she relaxed me and told me it wasn't the end of the world. That's really what I wanted to hear from her. The comfort of a loving mother, how I love her dearly. Anyways, she had told me that this is just something that I must overcome in order to become a stronger individual. Just one of many challenges life has to offer. So far, I'm holding my ground, and I'm letting go of something I held on to tightly. As she moves on, I shall also. Come to think about it, I'm still at a young age of 22. We have plenty of time on our hands, and time will tell.

What's next for me? I just have to move on. Sometimes, things happen for a reason, and time is the only cure for it. I'll always keep in contact with my ex-fiancee/best friend. And I can always talk to her about anything. From everyone else, thank you for the love and support for getting me through this tough time. I really appreciate it from the bottom of my heart, as it's slowly trying to rebuild.

To Jaina: I hope things will work out for the best. I know that I haven't always done the brightest things, but I try hard to make-up for them. This time, it'll take some time to work out, and I understand your decision. You will always have and be in my heart. I'll always be here for you know matter what. You know who to talk to. It's hard to let go, and I'll definitely be missing all the good memories. But, I know that we'll continue to talk in the long run. I miss you so much and love your with all my hearts content.

Life is an obstacle. We must overcome them to be STRONGER individuals.

All Is Not Lost

I have to admit, I have been pretty miserable these past two days, and come to think about it, I could never really last long with breaks. It's just hard for me to adapt from being constantly together, then to not see her or say, "I love you!", or give hugs and kisses. But everything is ok now. I talked to Jaina about a half an hour before this post and I told her everything that I had on my mind. And I'm glad that I did that because now, my mind feels a bit more free. I realized that everything that went bad was because of me. I have said and done the stupidest things that caused our first break up, and that didn't end up too well. I ended up failing almost every course that I took during that semester. I was just so depressed for the remaining year; it happened last year. And now that it was a new year, I completely blanked my mind out from everything that happened last year and I wanted to start off nice and fresh. But a couple of months into it, she wasn't happy. Just me doing this, me doing that. It just seems that everything I do isn't enough for her. I'm not sure what to do. All I can do is just express how much she means to me, and how much I want to spend my life with her.

But worst came to worst and she just couldn't take it. Honestly, she's right. We do need a break. And I'm just pushing her to take me back because I'm afraid that there might not be a next time. I truly want to be with her for the rest of my life, and if this is the only way that I could prove to her that this time will be different, then I shall do whatever it takes to have her back in my life. To get settle things down in my dilemma, I have resorted to the BIBLE. I have been reading the BIBLE on my iPhone, which is great because it's compatible and I'm always on that piece of technology. I'm just hooked like a fish, or a cigarette smoker, or alcoholic; well you know what I mean. Anyways, I have began reading from Genesis, and I'm currently on the 4th chapter. Man, I love my iPhone.



Anyway, this break up is not totally a break up for good. Just some time needed away from each other, so we can settle into our own, and pay off bills and splurge on ourselves. That's what she told me, but honestly, I'm already doing that, and I love splurgin' on her. How I wish that money did not overpower everyone. MONEY is the boss of everyone. People need it to survive in this world.

I'm not bickering and bursting into tears anymore, but I'm still a bit sad about this break. It's difficult not saying that things that you want to say, like "baby, princess, or I love you!" Hopefully, this relationship will be reconciled sometime soon. I'm a bit fatigued and fragile at the moment with everything that has been going on. I need to work out, get some energy, and get stronger. I need school to be done with already. I need a vacation.

I will NEVER stop loving you and I will NEVER try. My heart has always been with you.

A little prayer before I sleep.

Thank you LORD for everything that you have provided for me.
I realize that everything can't be perfect and only by learning through mistakes, we shall realize and correct what we did wrong.
I'm so thankful for the life you have given me, even though sometimes, I wish I wasn't born.
Please help me get through my troubles and the future that lies ahead.
And please watch over my familiy, my friends, Jaina, and even the bad people around the world.
Amen.

Good night everyone.

Love is Painful

Just as the title claims, "Love is Painful." After talking and reminiscing good ol' times with a couple co-workers, well, more like friends, Yul and Jared, I decided to talk to who was at the time, my girlfriend/fiancee. We decided, that things weren't working out as expected, so we decided to go our seperate ways for awhile. I was pretty sad to see her slip away from my fingers, and especially away from my heart. But what can I do?...Nothing really. But I have been with her for about 2 years and 10 months before we broke up. My heart has definitely shattered and disintegrated into nothing but dust. I would really love to grow old with her, but only time will tell. Maybe we're not meant to be? Well, I'm trying to move on because I don't want to be a burden to her any longer. My mind is just scrambling everywhere! And I just need a shoulder to cry on because I'm hurt.

All I can do now is concentrate on school and hopefully things will come into play. There's no doubt that I'll always love her, and she always has someone to talk to. I just can't help but reminisce about the good and the bad of our relationship.

I leave you off on a good note...this is all about the teachings of life. And happy endings don't always occur.

Just a couple of pictures from yesterday.

Jared's order.


Ulster's order.


Ulster's drink because he couldn't drink beer. Sorry man.


Kirin Beer is super SMOOOTTTHHH!! And don't forget Jared!


And my order. Small, but I was pretty full off of it.


Life's teachings are unpredictable. Cherish what you have before you lose them.

Free From My Shackles!!!

October 11, 2007, I officially got my brackets removed from my mouf! Boy, was I stoked. It was the weirdest feeling in my mouth after it was removed. I told Jared this earlier, "I feel like i can talk quicker, like I can rap as fast as Twista with all of this weight off!" Yeah right, I wish I could. That was the highlight of my day.

But moments later, when imprisoned in work, I talked to the new HR because I was about an hour early. I decided to head up to work right after my appointment because I was low on gas (getting really expensive and hurting the hell out of my pockets). Anyway, the new HR's name is Jessie. She's a chick, and for some reason, I just wasn't feelin her. I told her about my situation and how I needed a raise. So she pulled out my file, and she saw that I had an attendance problem that ended on April 2007. That was about a 5 months ago. I asked her if that was the reason that I haven't been getting a raise, and she said, "Yes!" They she said this in her exact words, "If I were the district manager, I would not approve you for this raise." So I told her, "If that's the case, then I'm going to quit!" I was really upset when I heard that from her mouth. I just wanted to argue with her about how much dedication I put into my job, basically all of my heart and soul. It's just upsetting that managers can't appreciate good help. Everything was going smoothly before Donovan's fat ass came through the store. It's his fault everything is so fucked up.

I talked to Ron, a co-worker in my department about the situation, and also Ernie. They were bummed and infuritated at the fact that she would say something like that. I guess Ron, told my supervisor, Jeff about the whole situation. Jeff talked to me and told me that he'll talk to Donovan on Saturday about the situation. Jeff also had something else to tell me. He had told me that when he first brought up the raise to Donovan and Theresa, they're excuse was that everyone was getting their hours cut, so he wouldn't approve anyone for a raise. The first thing that came to my mind was, "Bullshit!" For some reason, I think Donovan is just racist.

So today, was also Vince's (lot technician), a good buddy of mine from high school, last day at the Depot. Congratulations for him!! How lucky he is to get away from such a terrible store. For some reason, I think Donovan doesn't know how hard we fuckin work. I wish that Robert, our previous store manager was still around, and the other ASM's...Pedro, Todd, and other's I forgot to mention. They were the sickest staff I have ever worked with. I was cool with everyone of them.

Well, If nothing comes about from Jeff's talk with Donovan, I'll be putting in my two weeks and looking for a job elsewhere. Hopefully, I'll be able to find one right away.

I just had to get this one in: Someone at the Depot, not telling any names...Ron...told me that the reason why Robert moved to the Encinitas stores was because him and Theresa had something going on. And the funny thing is, Theresa is training to be a store manager at Encinitas. Coincidence?! I guess so. Fuck that bitch!! She never did anything for me, and I hope that she fails at everything she does. Seriously!

I'll leave you off with something positive.

Before Pictures:

My fat face and my braces:





After Pictures:

My fit face and NO braces:





YESSIR!! FRESH TO DEF!!

I leave you with a song that'll "PUT YOU TO BED"



GOOD NIGHT! :)

Golly Gosh Darn it

I just recently asked for another raise. And if I don't get it, I am really going to quit this time. This underappreciation is pushing me to the limits, and nothing is being done. This is my second time writing this stupid little summary on why I deserve a raise. If these people actually walked around the building, instead of staying in their stupid little offices, then they would know how much effort I put into everything I do. But the only thing that's holding me back is leaving all the great co-workers, turned into friends. I have made such good relationships with everyone there...joking, laughing, just having fun. And that's how work should be...Fun! Anyways, I didn't get the job as a Personal Trainer, and I haven't heard anything from Oreck Vacuum. I want to be a salesman there, and I could be darn good at it. Looks very simple and easy to learn. How hard could it be? Harder than Plumbing? I highly doubt that. And plus, they don't have a lot of inventory to remember and not to forget, stock. These two people have done nothing for me. Not to name any names...Donovan...Theresa...I HATE BOTH OF YOU, AND I HOPE THAT YOU FAIL IN WHATEVER YOU DO! Seriously, I'm glad that Theresa our HR is leaving, because she's such a pain. And Donovan...such a lazy waste of flesh and blood...and fat!! Get out of your chair, off your butt, and do something...geez!!

Well, I'm slowly getting out of the Jordan game, well just decreasing my shoe collection in order to make some space in my room which is slowly being renovated; contractors are extending my room, adding about 3 feet. Can't wait!! And I'll also be installing my ceiling fan after everything is completed. It'll be my own little project, and not to mention, free of charge! Sorry Ulster, I'm slowly leaving Jordan's...well, just getting rid of Jordan's that are common nowadays. But I'm holding on to my Laser IV's and Mocha III's. I'm still wanting those Black Laser IV's and I'll also be looking for another pair of DS or VNDS Infrared VI's. I just traded for a pair of kicks. OG Jordan VIII's (white/black) and VNDS Laney V's. Can't wait. for these to arrive. I don't know If I'll be rocking the VIII's...maybe use them as basketball shoes...not really sure what I want to do with these yet...probably sell em for some much needed cash. Anyway, I want to take another trip to NY...so i can get two hot dogs and their famous drinks for $3.99. Use to be $2.99. Anyways, I'm fiending for some hot dogs. I leave you with this picture.



Oh, how I miss NYC...Can't wait for the next trip. I miss you Grey's Papaya!