I have been too over-passive with my careless is sharing and I feel as if I am never rewarded or at least acknowledged for it. It seems like I always have to beg, or defend my case, and when I do, all I get is optimism and negative feedback from others. Things like that lower my self-esteem and decrease my level of interactive performance. I guess it's my halt for not putting my foot down and putting restrictions. But I feel that if I put restrictions, she pressures me, or makes me out to be the person that is just like the last boyfriend. So in conclusion, I'm being walked all over. I have no sense of control over a person, people choose their own destiny. And honestly, all I want to do is help, and I expect the same in return.
I work hard for everything I do, everything I receive, everything I disperse. I feel this sense of insecurity when I'm with my girl at the clubs Downtown. Why? Because 1, I got my heart broken over a promoter, and 2, I feel like something like that could happen again. But can you blame me for acting this way? I hope not. I'm beginning to ponder whether I am a good boyfriend. I feel that I need to stay up on this level. I can't be the person who I was and I need to adapt to who I want to become now, and that is a stronger individual.
I can't blame others, that's just the east way out. I can only blame myself.
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I don't know your situations, but all i know is that you did what you can to satisy for girlfriend's needs. If she cant accept your appreciation, she cant appreciate herself. She should never compare you and her exboyfrend. its a no no. she should never compare you to her ex coz its implying that yer not good enough for her or its not gonna werk out. im sure you will werk it out between you and her coz it's bothering for the both of you. Coming from another person's point of view, it's an up and down roller coaster.you have to realize that you did what you can to make each other happy. I know you are not happy because the way you are being put down by someone.U proven to her that you love her and shown her, how come she can't see that improvement and hardships through you? you take soo much effort to prove that you love her and shes blocking it. im sure she does the same for you but you done aLOt for her that she needs to think about her self too with her own mistakes. everyones not perfect, its just how relationships are, they are tough to werk out. thats why you gotta werk together, not putting eachother down. both of you guys should help eachother out,dont just blame eachother. maybe your faults are to blame or the problem itself. Look, I don't know ,but you really need to think about yourself, aLOT.of course it seems like you put yer girl first of ur priority,but does she really seem to satisfy you by being put down and being criticized? If ur girl loves you soo much, she shouldnt be treating you like sh*t. she should respect you as a person not a dog or a wall. you are a person that should and need to be respected. if you get disrespected, you will have to stand up for yourself. either its your girlfriend or not, you shouldnt be disrespected. be yourself and the person you are right now. she or enyone cannot change you because enybody cannot change a person, they are who they are and they can't do anything about that. you tried to change for your girl, but is it really werking? no, coz its not who you are. be yerself. and i noe it depends on the person of who you feel most comfortable with. you have good frends to hang out,you are yourself, you do wat you do and you noe wats fun or not. but wen yer with yer gurl,its totally diffrent. you are completely comfortable with your girl but are you really? is it the same feeling when you hang out with your frends and do stupid stuff and fun stuff together? is that the same wen yer with yer gurl? hmmm, u are whipped over her.wat can u do? dont sey that you want to adapt to who you want to become now, jus be for who you are already and accept yourself. dont let yer girl or enyone change you because its not werking!! you tried that!you can change a bit about yourself on a certain extend though.... im thinking that yer gurl is seying,'your not good enough for me'. hence, that is why she is putting you down. again,maybe im wrong, maybe you did something bad inthe past that hurt her? but this is all i can sey about my thoughts and u should think about it. i may be right on a few points. i have to sey this once more, if shes telling you to be the person that is like her last boyfrend, then it sounds like she doesnt accept you as a boyfriend!im guessing she has list of a perfect boyfrend already! shes picking on your faults and dislikes about you! if yer gurl truly loves you, then she should be happy and accepting for who you are.. of course you cant control over a person, she just cant control herself to accept you as a person that you are now. if you done mistakes inthe past, she should noe that you love her and only her and shes the only one in yer life. if she noes that, why she gon put you down still guy?!freal, i noe how you feel. thats why you gotta think about yerself more often,is this the gurl that yer gonna be with for the rest of yer life that doesnt accept you? how can you be yourself and more comfortable with her?shes lucky to have a boyfrend like you, you do so much for her and you still be treated like shet. if im off track of wat your bloggin, im sorry, this could be a misunderstanding. last thing, if you want to be respected, you should respect them first. if you dont get the respect back that you deserve, then u will have to disrespect them by standing up for urself. take cares julius. hope things go well in yer life, im kinda worried about you now.
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